Dreamers heart
What is a dream, could it be a dream? This haunting echo? Could this memory of happiness be nothing nothing more then a nights shadow? The happiness of the moment only lasted for a few breaths. It seemed so real this hope. To have a family whole and safe, to believe in loving warmth and the ideal life. it seemed so real, but the best dreams are. It seemed to be the only thing keeping me alive this hope....
Although while I stirred and awoke a blanket of fear came to greet me, Always there, always whispering.
He wouldn't be there, not by my side, not with me, very much not real. As I searched the darkness for a stranger that promised so much seemed to choked me in a crushing blow of fear. My soul struggled against the silken wires holding me imprisoned. I panicked.
All the fowl memories of the past came rising up like a flood, I knew I would drown.
I knew this man, I knew him well, he would be the prince in the abyss who kept me safe. I knew somewhere in my subconscious he wasnt real. But I was so desperate to this soul that I believed in him. Without this shadow I felt weak, scared, worthless, alone. I was terrified by such a simple thing as a dream.
The pain came in waves, tightening around my chest like a constrictor, as I wait in vain at times my mind will drift back and remember it so clearly. They were like memories, something that felt so real. yet so far out of reach.
The memories blend with reality and I've watched from afar as i become confused and unknowing. My memory seems to weaken and fade. not knowing where to go, where to turn to, what to say was the beginnings of insanity.
What can I do? I have forgotten, Please wake up, this endless nightmare, I cant escape, Cant out run, and a question comes from the mist "Why can't I? This place seems so real this personal hell of mine. can this be so? Just a nightmare I can not escape?
I want to live here, it calls to me, it's so familiar, what is this endless pain? This endless void that seduces me? Could it be nothing more then a glass mirror to which ive become entranced by my own reflection with?
I am dead, but not dead, I am death for the dying self, forsaken and alone, I am alive but not part of the living, then like a ocean wave I'm crushed with the reality.......I Am the dream.
The End
